Do I really want that croissant? Will I still be able to button my pants if I eat that croissant? What is going to happen with Ebola? If I am going to die of Ebola anyway, why not just eat the stupid croissant?
Etc.
This type of internal dialogue is what gets me through the day. I have perfected my, “Oh, of course I’m paying attention to what your saying. You are so INTERESTING. Please go on.” face so that I can happily talk to myself inside my head while people are blathering on about….well, frankly I have no idea what.
Lately, my pick and choose questions have been focused around happiness (hence all the french pastry references). The two questions that have kept me wondering are points I think it is important for everyone to consider.
Happiness Questions:
How many things do you do every day because you feel like you have to? How would your life be different if you focused on doing only the things you wanted to?
I pick and choose lots of things every day because I feel like I have to. Wake up and go to work. Put on pants that do not allow me to plow an endless stream of croissants into my face. Act friendly moderately friendly tolerant towards people I do not enjoy speaking to. Save money. Research health insurance options. Drink water instead of vodka soda coffee. Some of these things are important in the long run. Some, I am coming to realize, are simply an excuse to remain in a whirlpool state of moderate dissatisfaction.
“Oh, of course I’m not that happy. I have to (fill in this blank with some annoying activity) every day/week/month/whatever.” In considering this conundrum, I have reached the following ideal: I would like to be happy, immediately in-the-moment happy, 80% of the time. Even at work. Or talking to people I don’t enjoy. All the more if I’m tired.
The other 20% I will be satisfied participating in activities that I believe have the potential to make me happy in the future (actively attempting not to lose my job, picking a good health care package, collecting my birth control pills thyroid medication from the pharmacy, etc)
This may take some life tailoring.
Step 1:
Actively consider the activities that make me unhappy. For me, this is anything that causes stress. Measure their importance and the amount of time spent on these activities.
Step 2:
Actively consider the activities that make me happy. For me, this may involve reading books, resting and (gasp) having fun at work with the 100 students I teach every day. Instead of making them think life is a series of serious, boring meetings. (Which, side note, if you’re not careful, it is.)
Step 3:
Organize my time so I spend more of my day on the things that make me happy. “Work smarter” as they say, and get unpleasant things over with quickly.
Step 4:
Reassess. Are the activities I picked causing me long term happiness? Is there stress from anything I am leaving undone?
In celebration of the fall, I am going to embark on this little experiment. The 80% experiment. Deep breath (because they make me happy, duh). Wish me luck.